Endorphins vs. Naps.

After coming home with Elena, all I wanted to do was look at her when she slept, and then run and get something to eat and try to "do" something.  I remember making a chicken soup from scratch after we had eaten a farmer's market chicken the night before--I made the stock and then prepared all of the stuff to go in it.  That particular morning stands out in my mind as a particular waste of my postpartum time.  Lucky for me, Josh had a nice chunk of time free of work duties and though those weeks went fast we did enjoy that time.

A friend sent me a message this week via Facebook, which saves all of your past correspondence with others--the last time we had messaged was after Elena's birth, and I remember the morning that I told him about.  I had trouble sleeping in that first week, and would wake before Elena and Josh and make some lactation tea and breakfast and enjoy the quiet.  I had my tea in the early morning sun, enjoying the heat on my legs.  I don't really think that was a waste of time, because I remember feeling perfectly peaceful and deeply happy, and those moments should be savored.

Again I feel this pull between the rush of endorphins post-delivery and the impending overwhelming sleep deprivation.  Today was busy--I finished off the batch of butt balm that I had started a couple of weeks ago, shattering a glass in the process.  Elena had her first doctor's appointment with Tia Liz, and Mommy snipped her frenulum there (maybe more on that later).  Then we went to lunch, got Tia Liz some caffeine as a thank you for seeing us during her lunch hour, and headed home for a quick nap before Elena got home.  Elena was her usual energetic self, aligning Nina's diapers in lines around our room, and then placing Josh's loose socks neatly over diapers while we Skyped with my parents.  Josh's parents brought us dinner, and Uncle Tio and Isabelle came over after their dinner.  I'm beat.  And yet blogging as Nina sleeps peacefully next to me.

It's a battle.  Endorphins vs. naps.  I wish I could say that I will try to help naps win out in the next few days, but there is just so much I want to write about and read about (plus some outstanding patient charts from Monday that need to get finished) that I know I will end up burning nap time in favor of blogs and google searches.  Oh well.  I'm taking 8 weeks instead of 6 this time, so at least I have that in my favor!